I want to be the Hero!
You can't!
Why not?
You're a dentist!
What?
You're a dentist.
Yeah, I got that but what does that have to do with anything?
What do you mean?
On TV. In the movies. I want to be a hero. I want to save the day. I want to appear out of nowhere with just the right moves, right words, right actions to defeat evil. It's never the dentist. The dentist is always the wacky neighbor. I want to be the hero.
But everyone hates you. You can't be the hero.
Everyone hates lawyers too. And I mean really hates lawyers. For example,
"You're in a room with Osama Bin Laden, Adolf Hitler and a Lawyer. You have a gun with only two bullets. What do you do?
You shoot the lawyer twice."
You don't hear dentist jokes like that! So if lawyers can be heros so can dentists.
But you do painful procedures. You can't be the hero.
Have you ever heard of a Barium-Air Driven Enema? How about a catheter? Physicians can be heros. Why not me?
You're too imposing. People feel pressure when they are around you. They're uncomfortable.
You mean like when a policeman pulls you over on the freeway or when the fireman stops traffic to stick a boot in your face to collect money for their favorite charity? Do you think the police would allow me to drive a great big truck to an intersection, put on the flashers and then walk up and down in traffic begging for money? They get to be heros.
Sorry. No chance. You will have to be there when we need you. Fix our pain. Remind us to do better. Be ignored. Fix our pain. Remind us again. Give us free stuff. Get paid most of the time. Make us feel better. Apologize for not being able to fix the things that we've neglected. Rescue us whenever we call and face our indignation whenever the insurance company decides to not fulfill their implied committments.
You mean I have to be like a dad.
Right. And no whining.
(Ok, you can whine to your wife but never to us)
Do I have to pick up my underwear?
Only on Mother's Day.
OK. I can be a Dad. Dad's are heroes.
At least on Father's Day.
5 comments:
I saw the smile on your patient's face yesterday. You are a hero, for real.
And you've always been my hero. :-)
A real hero would pick up his own underwear everyday! Dads certainly are heroes...I dread the dentist office, but I think I've been saved from many a toothache by dentists, so you totally qualify. I bet Higglytown Heroes did an episode on dentists. Guaranteed.
I smell an M. Knight Shamalahayamayamalan movie. The dentist as the hero...total plot twist that no one would expect. I can hear them coming out of the theater now..."I knew it wouldn't be the dentist. He was just there for comedy relief and then BAM! He saves the day." "No doubt. I thought he'd be the villain...I thought all dentists were evil."
As a mother of kids with Rotten Teeth Of Doom, dentists are my hero. Especially ones who tell me I'm not a bad mother for raising chalk-teethed children!
You know who else could have used a hero in the dental arena...George Washington. Check out his pic and consider that he had those terrible dentures. http://www.hhfi.org/tbdf/Portals/0/North%20Braddock/george-washington-picture.jpg
I think the best among us are in a constant struggle to do good and help those around us. At the end of the day the joy and comfort of those we encounter and have lifted up will determine our hero status. Saving someone from a burning building, chronic pain or a boo-boo are all heroic acts that influence lives to a significant degree.
This is from Rob: Have you ever seen "The Shakiest Gun in the West"? The dentist, played by Don Knotts, is the hero!!!! We have it if you want to borrow it. We should do a double or triple date (with Steve and Laura) and watch it. It's hilarious.
You try to act like your not a hero but I know you are. You will always be, in my mind at least, the hero or Bishop who saved me from self destruction. Besides that you made my teefies so nice!!!!
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